February 24, 2014

Famous Footwear

I wanted to get my son a pair of boots the other day.  He keeps wearing his Dad's around the house and my husband figured if we got him his own he wouldn't wear his anymore.  Little does he know.  So, off I went on my adventure to WalMart and of course they have no boots.  I really didn't want to make a big deal of this or spend a lot of money when Spring hopefully is right around the corner. 

I figured I could run into the Famous Footwear that was down the road from WalMart and if they didn't have anything then I was at a loss.  Of course I had both of the kids with me and it was torrential down pour and really cold so this really was not big on my list of things to do but I'm a good wife and mother!  Right? 

I knew it was probably going to be a nightmare but I really didn't' think I would have to apologize to the store clerk for my children's behavior.  Yup, I was that Mom with those kids, and you have to be careful when spanking your kids in public because you never know who is watching!

When we entered the store you would have thought that I had two dogs that were being let off their leashes for the first time and they wanted to sniff everyone's butts.  Not really but you get the idea with two crazy dogs.  My son went crazy and was running around like a lunatic and jumping on the benches like he was performing some grand show at a gymnastics event.  My daughter was chasing him around and I know she was trying to do good but she actually just made my son more excited and made it worse.  People watching though wouldn't have thought that. 

I was trying to get my son's foot in a boot and it was not working for me so I asked the clerk for help.  She was the only clerk in the store of course.  Lucky for me there were only like two customers in the store and for some reason they really didn't stick around too long after my kids entered.  She measured his foot and gave me the size.  The boot I had was like two sizes under what she said but when you put it up to his foot it looked huge.  The clerk then informed me that I couldn't get the boot on because my son's foot was too wide for the boot.  Well that explained a lot and after thinking about it that is probably why I had so much trouble trying to get his foot into other boots.  Sorry.  So we found the right size and the right width for my son and lucky me the boot was on sale.

As I am cashing out I am apologizing for my kids and the clerk says, "It is ok.  I have a lot of patience with kids and I think they are fine.  If he was like 7 or 8 then I would have a problem."  I didn't really know what to say to that.  I am not sure if she was saying they weren't that bad or if she was saying, you can get away with it now but not for long.  While I was paying my daughter was trying to catch my son and bring him to me which didn't really work out.  I got through paying and saying my Sorry's and Thank You's and I asked my daughter where she was.  This was her response:


That is no joke either.  We are in a shoe store and I ask wear my daughter is (who is with my wild son) and she tells me she is over by the shoes. 

I counted to three and then said, You are going to have to be more specific. 

I was so glad to get out of there.


I am pretty sure my son is the devil but I still love him anyways. 

I was getting the kids ready for bed one night and my daughter was tucked in and watching TV and my son was roaming around some where so I decided to get my pjs on and do my bed time ritual.  This always takes a process being a woman and I have to dedicate like 20 min to do this.  You know, take the make up off, wash the face, brush the teeth and hair and get into pjs.  I usually do this about the same time I am getting the kids into bed and off to dream land.

This one particular night as I was in the middle of my bed time process, I heard my son give out a blood curdling scream.  You know the one where he is really hurt and needs Mom like ASAP.  I started running towards the scream and ended up in my daughters room.  She was sitting on the bed watching TV and I said Where is your brother?  She of course replied, I don't know.  As I am standing there I can hear the scream but I cannot find him for the life of me.

Now the room is not that big and her bed is against one wall and her dresser against another wall and the last wall has her toy box against it so I am really concerned that I know he is there somewhere but I can't see him.  I had a blonde moment and spaced for a second and thought that he was in the walls.  I know, I know, so STUPID but that is exactly where he sounded like he was coming from and it really took everything I had not to scream, FOLLOW THE LIGHT!!!  Anyone ever see Poltergeist?  The little girl was stuck in the TV so it can HAPPEN!!

After a few moments of hyperventilating and panicking just a little, his little leg popped out from under the bed.  I felt so relieved I thought I was going to cry.  He crawled under the bed to get a ball that was under there and got stuck at some point.  My Mommy muscles kicked in and I lifted the bed like freaking Wonder Woman and pulled him out. 

This whole time my daughter apparently had no idea that he was under there.  What made a 1 year old go crawling under the bed baffles me.  I don't even crawl under beds now.  That freaks me out and for the exact reason of what happened to my son. 

I was relieved I didn't have to tell my husband that I thought we were going to have to tear walls down.  He would have thought I was really losing it.  However, he was underneath the bed that was against the wall so that would explain why I thought he was in the walls!

FOLLOW THE LIGHT!!  HAHAHA  It might have made that moment even better if I did say that out loud, but I was thinking it!